This Is Why Your Bartender Hates You

Most all of these are forgivable if one tips like a freaking champion though, no?

how about this.. shut up and make me a f*cking drink for christsakes

tom_b: no. you're still obnoxious whether or not you're trying to impress the girl next to you (or the one behind the bar) by throwing your money around. tip regularly, act politely. who wants to pay extra for the privilege to be ignorant?

lame article! lame list! yer lame! and ps it's only annoying when the peeps making out at the bar are ugly.

tom_b: Nope. You can throw money around, but then you're just being a jerk with money. If you want to spend money to have some pretend to like you, you want a sex worker and not a bartender.

Also - unless you've worked in the service industry (be it bartender, waiter/waitress, line cook, or fry cook), you can complain all you want how the above list isn't true or that it's not right, but don't expect anyone to take you seriously. Especially the person you want to pour you a drink.

Yeah, I understand. Didn't mean to come across that way. I was just kinda shocked to NOT see any mention of tipping in the article.
SF being a vacation destination, many of the tenders I know in town the lack of a tip is #1 on their list of hated things.
But if everyone would follow these rules the world would be a better place:
http://www.drunkard.com/issues/01-02/01_02_booze_rules.htm

Bartenders are in a service role. Let's not forget that. They are also typically overpaid for a career that involves pouring liquid from a bottle into a glass. This article epitomizes the mentality of the smug SF hipster douche.

Hey Anti-Smugsters,

No doubt the job is in the service industry, but it doesn't mean they should be treated like servants. No one likes taking shit at work.

Anti-Smugsters probably sends a lot of time bitching about bad service.

This one smacks of snobbery. Not everyone goes to bar-tending school... if someone asks for Cranberry and vodka and you give them 2 separate glasses you are just being a jerk for the sake of being a jerk. I go to a bar maybe once a year and have no idea what I'm doing; but I'm not rude... those are 2 different concepts.

"You don't know what the hell you're ordering.
If you order "cranberry and vodka" you'll receive two drinks: a glass of cranberry juice and one of vodka. If you order "vodka and cranberry," you'll get one glass containing both. "

Aside from the point about snapping at bartenders (which I've never actually witnessed), I don't see any examples outlined above where customers are treating bartenders like servants.

If anything, the majority of this article (right down to the title) argues why drink servers should feel entitled to act rude toward their patrons.

Very fair point, howardtaft. I thought similarly.

While I know that snapping is bad, what is the proper etiquette for getting bartenders attention? I've seen some bartenders simply acknowledge you with a nod, and then I know he saw me and will get to me soon. I wish all bartenders were like that, but what do you do when they're not?

@tom_b: No. Keep your fucking tip and don't ever come back.

@satan & @Anti-Smugsters: Get the fuck out of my bar.

@Steven, @bridgetunnel & @DanB: Next one's on me.

@ballz: From a bartender, article is not lame. And making out is always wrong.

@howardtaft: Just say the liquor first and we're good. Knowing is half the battle.

@Martin: Do your part to just make eye contact. Judge how busy the bar is. Never wave money or snap though, maybe just give a quick wave when the bartender is looking your way.

As a bartender (who cut my teeth in SF) I just want to say I loved this article. So on point.

"Keep your fucking tip and don't ever come back."
Smug.

The only difference between a bartender and a grocery store bagger is that I have to tip the bartender.

@howardtaft @pedestrienne: would you ever order tonic gin? coke jack? soda vodka? coke rum? seven bourbon? Try saying it out loud.

While SF requires EVERYONE (including servers) to be paid minimum wage, MOST bar tenders across the country are paid Half-minumum wage (ie UNDER paid) for a job that requires you to constantly be on your feet and deal with a lot of stress, not to mention a great deal of specialized knowledge (including about a lot of legal liability).

Being GOOD at mixing drinks (or knowing what they are) is worth the $10 an hour that a bartender makes. If all you use a bartender for is pouring you shots or opening a beer, that's your choice. It's like saying your Dr is over paid because all they do is write you prescriptions.

That being said, there an unacceptable number of bad bartenders in the bay area with entitlement issues who have no idea what they're doing. Splitting hairs between "Cranberry & Vodka" and "Vodka & Cranberry" is obnoxious considering the drink is called a Cape codder.

Anti-Smugsters = Never worked in the service industry.

PS Please stay the fuck out of my bar.

Dolph Lundgren = Entitled dick.

PS I bet you're a shitty tipper no matter how good the service may be.

'If you order "cranberry and vodka" you'll receive two drinks: a glass of cranberry juice and one of vodka. If you order "vodka and cranberry," you'll get one glass containing both.'

This sounds more like why somebody would hate their bartender. With stupid, arbitrary rules like that, you can never know what the hell you're ordering.

'You order your drink "strong." ... unless you're ordering a double, you're implying that your bartender makes weak drinks.'

If you are overly sensitive, then bartender might not be a great fit for you. Don't assume people are insulting you unless they are actually insulting you. If somebody orders a strong drink, just assume they like their drinks stronger than most. You'll be a lot happier if you give people the benefit of the doubt.

If you believe bartenders are glorified bag boys, you've never seen a real bartender at work. You go to sports bars where everyone orders beer or vodka Red Bulls because a) it's too loud to hear anything else and b) the bartender is really just a beer slinger who wouldn't know how to make a Sazerac without Googling the recipe.

A real bartender knows hundreds of cocktails and has his or her own unique spin on most of them, just like a real chef does, and deserves respect for that skill.

(BTW, I am not a bartender. I'm just an appreciative alcoholic.)

As neither architect, doctor, lawyer, nor engineer, I'll admit college wasn't necessary to learn bartending, but it does take a fair amount of dexterity and the ability to think on your feet. I'll admit having been paid a decent wage as well (cooks still make more per hour), but remember I'm in charge of the atmosphere and energy level in the house, I'm supposed to have an adequate knowledge base for the cockamamie recipes you want from time to time, I have to be fast, accurate with cash and math, consistently pleasant, capable of dealing with your baggage on my shift, and ensure enough general "safety" in the house to keep you from overindulging and potentially keeping your butt as well as my own out of the clink for any potential or accidental "mistakes."
Check your wallet: bring money and friends, but bring an equal or greater amount of respect to dispense with your tips for the staff and show courtesy for the establishment's other patrons, too. What a bartender does for you is called babysitting, and it ain't free.

*tips a glass in toast to alejo699*

May I buy you another drink for the sharing of your wisdom?

Even more reasons:

http://www.generation-awesome.com/bartender/

I agree with satan (not the first time) most bartenders are hipster fucks. make me a drink and if you aren't a douche while doing it i will give you a nice tip.

Every one of us has seen a bartender, off shift, enjoying a beverage in the establishment they work in: they are getting to know others, being social, and relaxing - kinda like you.
I've been approached by customers wishing I'd teach another employee the nuances of the "perfect" Bloody Mary, where I've had to remind them that *my* recipe for that "perfect" drink involved listening to the customer as they described their preference for spicing and intensity (more/less hot sauce, salt or no salt, dash or 4 splashes of Worcestershire sauce, etc., etc.) and adjusting accordingly -- THAT'S how you make a "perfect" Bloody Mary.

The only thing that could be more worthless than this post would be: "This is why people who work at the DMV hate you," because I don't give a shit. Do your job like the rest of us and be happy you have one. Where is this bullshit sense of entitlement coming from?

@NBA:
I would gladly accept that drink. I'm thinking something in a nice gin?

My bartender's great and she does good karaoke too. Always has a smile and she always gets a tip.

Really, that's what it comes down to - there is a perceived obligation to tip a bartender (or anyone else in a services role) regardless as long as you eventually receive your food/drink. Most people, including myself, abide by this (I would also absolutely tip my Dr if it were socially acceptable).

My experience on average with SF bars specifically has been if you don't act like a total asshole while doing your job, you'll receive a better, "deserved" tip. That shouldn't be very hard to do, but it definitely happens.

This article could very well be titled "This is why I hate going out in the Mission."

@alejo699:

Top shelf, since I'm not an afficionado of gin, but will defer to your preference, certainly!

Jesus Christ, if your so picky about the customers you get, get a new fucking job. Wouldn't it be nice if the world was perfect?

On the sixth point; I agree with the principal but not the example. Drink names differ regionally, "cranberry and vodka", "vodka and cranberry" are the same depending on where you are (not to be confused with "cran-vodka" which would net you a shot of cranberry flavored vodka most places).

A better point on that is, know your drink of choice (or atleast liquor if you're looking for suggestions, hopefully NOT at a crowded bar) when you approach the bar. When a bar-tender asks "Can I get you something?" and you respond with "umm....." and a blank stare at the specials board, don't be shocked when they walk away and go onto the next customer. If for some reason they don't have your choice, go with a quick second or politely say "I'll need a minute then". Essentially, don't waste their time and everyone gets their drinks faster.

I would much rather stay home and drink. It's cheaper, less noisy, and there are fewer drunks looking to cause trouble.

I have worked in the service industry throughout my life. This article IS smug. So what if you have some bad customers. Deal with it. Thats part of the job. Dont bitch about it. If you want another job, go get one.

The thing that sucks working in the service industry the most...listening to coworkers whining about their tables or customers. Yeah the customers suck. Whats new? Deal with it.

With that said, it would be nice if people would learn to treat service workers as fellow human beings and not servants. However, if you do get treated like a servant, deal with it.

They hate me because I dance naked on the bar and pee on everyone

I think my bartender hate because we are all getting drunk on Gin and Juice and he be thinking, "I am on the wrong side of the bar".

My bartender loves me. He's so slamtastically good looking that I tip him just for being so damn HOT.

dang, i thought my bartender liked it when i tell her i like my drink strong like my ladies?...come to think of it...maybe thats why she barely talks to me!

Not a bartender:

Most of us are in the service industry. Doctors, Bankers, Lawyers, Bar Tenders, Indian chiefs. We serve clients, customers, patrons, patients, constituents and parishoners.

I'm one of the above. Who among us hasn't thought "this would be a great job if it weren't for the clients, customers, etc." They can be rude, obnoxious, stingy, whatever but where would we be without them?

As a bartender, you'll unfortunately have to deal with these kinds of patrons. And there's worse people than listed here. Its how you deal with them that determines your professionalism and ultimately your tips at the end of the night.
In my Bartending...and Beyond! bulletin last month, I wrote about how to deal with that impatient guy, the one yelling "service, service" and pounding on the bar:
http://www.bars-and-bartending.com/Bartendingand_Beyond-bartending-and-beyond-vol2.html

Look most of these are common sense. Don't be a dick when the bar is busy. Know what you want.

As for 'making the drink strong part'...if you make my drink stronger, you get a bigger tip. I know that most bartenders are alloted a certain amount of "free drinks" they can give out to keep customers spending money. They don't give a fuck about you personally simply because you get a free shot. Drunk people spend more money.

I can't remember how many shitty bars I've been to where they give you a splash of rum with a glass of coke because the establishment is cheap. as. shit. A packed room apparently = screw it you're gonna buy it anyway so fuck you. Bottom line is that me more drunk = more money for you. If you make my drink weak or I perceive that you're inattentive (when it's slow), then I care fuck all about making the bartender happy. His/her job is to make ME happy.

However, if you're getting a "normal" drink and you want it stronger....you're a douche. Just ask for a double.